The Artful Duke in Bromley

This was food fit for farm animals. Halloumi Fries, more like flappy Halloumi. These were not fries but rather a limp and soggy mess. These were being charged a brain numbing £8 for items I could wave at passers by. Vegetarian Wellington, not hot but cold. Once again produced in a sloppy mess even as an unintentional cold dish, that had zero firmness and literally fell apart when introducing my fork to it. I sent it back and it was hotter than before, but somehow they managed to make it even sloppier. If I was in a care home and had trouble chewing my food, this would have been Michelin star food. At least the seasonal vegetables were fine as they were cooked and hot. I get that some food items are premade and cooked and heated to order, but when this just means shove it in the microwave for a minute or 2 and then serve it up, shows a complete lack of attention and care to the patron. The poor lady serving me was apologetic, but she can only do so much if the kitchen staff who have clearly trained in a Russian penal establishment won't even bother making decent food. I won't be going back

In two minds about writing this review. But I think as a hospitality worker of 17 years I have to for the sake of my own karma. 11 of us walked into the business on a Sunday afternoon after seeming a show. Had I personally known in advance that 11 of us would be eating that afternoon, I would have researched the area and booked a table, because 11 people waltzing in a business on a Sunday lunch in a sports pub before a football game is……less than ideal in this restaurant managers opinion, so that’s apology no.1 to the team. But they pushed tables together for us, no problem and provided us with table service. I’m still not sure was the norm. I didn’t see anyone else getting table service. But they took our order very speedily and our food arrived super fast. Food was not bad. It filled a hole nicely. My fries were very nice. Unfortunately a poor waitress accidentally spilled ketchup on my friend who didn’t take it with the jovial humour I might have done, but in her defence she’s been though a lot lately and doesn’t have a lot of sense of humour going spare right now. But I just want to say to that waitress, you were so great. So professional. I could see you were absolutely mortified and you were doing such sincere and great job of apologising. Mistakes happen and we’ve all been there (well some of us) And thank you for taking those drinks off of the bill, it was very kind of you. So in conclusion, staff great! even though we were THAT TABLE.

We have been going to the Artful Duke since it opened. It’s dog friendly and has a good vibe and the decor is great. It is an expensive pub but was worth it for the ambiance. However we visiting last week and ordered a large Pinot Giorgio blush , Guinness and a pack of crisps. Our round came to over £20. We couldn’t understand it and checked the drinks menu. Two roses one the Pinot which was Italian at £9.15 the other Provence at £11.95 . I ordered another round at the bar, same price but asked for the receipt. They had charged us £11.95 for the Italian . My husband went to the bar and explained it to the lady who served us. She said no that can’t be as they only have the Provence. My husband said no , look at the bottle , it is the Italian which is cheaper. So she said ‘What do you want me to do about it’. My husband said to refund us please for the two wines overcharged. Think this was £5.60. The lady did refund us but it is worrying how many other people may of been charged the more expensive wine but really got the cheaper Italian. There is quite a difference in price

After being disappointed with my meal ordered today I thought I would give them a call as I have been really pleased with the previous Sunday Roasts ordered. However I was greeted by the head chef who was very rude and dismissed my comments on the pork belly roast which was dry, the vegetables & pots un-seasoned, califlower cheese was just a white sauce (no cheese). The Apple sauce and yorkie was missing! The standards have gone down hill here and the chef needs to go! Very rude and unproffesional! Would not order again after this experience. Shame really as all the other roasts were really good which is why I have came back time and time again. They even offer a dog roast which is a very generous portion.

30 seconds of walking throu the door seconds before asking for our drinks… I was rudely approached and assumed I was a child… asking for my ID would have been acceptable.. needless to say I was very uncomfortable and embarrassed to say the least!! I shall not be returning