Dulhan in Tonbridge and Malling

With 30 real ales on tap available in 1/3, 1/2 and pints this place just gets better and better.

Tried a veggie takeaway from Indi18 and, well… if subtlety were a sport, this meal would be in the Olympics. Let’s start with the tarka daal — a dish so mild, it could’ve been a side character in a Jane Austen novel. We kept waiting for the garlic and cumin to show up, but apparently they had the night off. Comforting? Sure. Memorable? Only if you enjoy beige. The saag paneer was the real plot twist. We expected bold, creamy spinach with juicy cubes of cheese. What we got was paneer floating in a green puddle that tasted like regret and missed opportunities. It desperately needed seasoning — like, even a whisper of salt would’ve helped. We’re not saying it was bland, but it made plain rice look edgy. Bombay aloo was the best of the lot, which is saying something because even it felt like it was just there for the participation trophy. The potatoes were soft, sure, but the spice level was somewhere between “barely detectable” and “was this boiled in tea water?” To be fair, the packaging was neat and everything arrived hot — so if you enjoy tidy disappointment, this place delivers. Literally. In summary: we wanted flavour fireworks. We got a damp sparkler and a polite nod. Hope they were just having an off night — because right now, we’re still emotionally recovering… with a bag of crisps.

A great find and definitely will return high-quality food with great friendly service at fair prices

Dylan was so friendly and attentive. He made our lunch even better. The chilli chicken was really good and so was the Aperol spritz!

Very welcoming and nice atmosphere. Service was very good. We all enjoyed our meals, the food was delicious. We will be back soon.