No Man's Fort Restaurant in Portsmouth - Phone Number, Reservations, Reviews

Evening Dinner - Twilight experience. This was a birthday celebration with family, I booked the dinner via the solent forts website and did not receive a confirmation email. I waited until the next morning and still nothing, I called the number provided on the website and the lady on the phone confirmed my details and said she would be sending through the confirmation email now. I had yet to receive the email and thought everything would be fine nonetheless. I was told to go to Gunwarf and check in before the departure at 6.30pm to be by the gate by 6.20 and to check in at the solent fort station in gunwarf just after 6. She did not mention anything else to me and I did not receive the confirmation email. The service on the departure boat was disorganised and the staff were incredibly loud and noisy. on arrival to the fort we were left at the reception area for quite some time before someone came down and said 'oh sorry come on this way up'. There is air conditioning in the reception area but nowhere else i could see and incredibly stuffy. the historic tour guide spoke incredibly fast and there was too much information involved with the tour and no time to digest any of it. it was poorly organised and after waiting in the queue at the bar on the outer deck for quite a while the bar man stated cash only with no sign visible anywhere. When it was time for dinner we were expecting a private table for us to celebrate the birthday but we were instead seated with another group. I asked the waiter why we did not have a separate table and he said 'you have to request a separate table at no extra charge as per confirmation email - THE EMAIL I NEVER RECEIVED and of which the lady on the phone did not mentioned anything about when i asked her ' is there anything else I need to be aware of'? The waiter said it was too late for him to set up a separate table for us now. yet we arrived at the fort an hour earlier and the welcoming staff member who also did the historic tour could have asked to check and explained the dinner table seating and whether anyone needed anything. if this had been done I would have been able to speak to a staff member to have hopefully had a table made up for us. The starter tasted as if it had been made the previous day and garnished that evening. the environment was poorly lit and dangerously hot. with no fans made available. the main and dessert were average and when it came to paying for the drinks I had to get up and find a waitress to ask how we settle that considering the booking fee included her dinner part of it. she said we had to pay at the counter which isn't clearly visible, after realising the clear point that nobody knew what they should be doing she started walking around table and telling guests ' oh and when you're ready you can pay at the counter over there'. it felt very disorganised and the service of cheap quality considering this was expensive dinner and supposed to be a unique experience. After dinner we had some free time to explore before the return departure at 11:15pm. When the return boat arrived, the same waiter who told me it was too late to set up a table for us was then running to the boat around the fort path with two coffees/tea's at hand for the boat staff not paying much attention to the guests waiting and appearing quite unprofessional. The return boat was twice/three times smaller than the departure tourist boat. this boat had no actual seating or safety information and we were not information of any health and safety rules, we were NOT GIVEN any life jackets and the seating was just boat benches with some foam covers on top to sit on. At this point it was dark, and there is a covered and uncovered area to this boat. we were sat in the covered area where the driver and staff of the boat were. the waiter and another two staff members were also on the boat as I expect they were returning home after work and this was also their transport. during the journey the two male staff members were talking to the driver, distracting him, and at one point had a phone out with the light shining. Suddenly the boat pushed to the left which was the way we were facing and almost capsized. the boat bent sideways at such speed and with such force that a number of guests on the boat fell forward flying to the areas/seats/people/ benches in front. my partner and I fell forward then when the boat fell back into place we fell back and I hit my lower back onto the bench I was sitting on as a result. Next to us I had my diabetic mother, and my father with a heart condition, asthmatic and both at an older age. to my left a male guest also fell forward and the people sitting in the uncovered area could have easily fallen in the water when falling forward WITH NO LIFE JACKETS AND NO ACTUAL SEATING! we shared our distress with the driver and staff on the boat afterwards as the journey continues and the driver apologised and said that ' The ferry that passed caused the current and that these things happens and it was so sudden he hadn't seen it'. the waiter who was on board apologised and said this happens some times. My partner and I have been to this fort before and on a similar return journey, we did not think they would have the same kind of boat again nor did we expect such a horrible experience this time round. As per the staff's words if these things happen so often and they do quite a few journeys a day and hundreds a month. WHY HAVE THEY NOT YET PUT in place a better return boat with actual seating and not even offering life jackets. someone could have been seriously hurt, or worse fallen in the water. I am now on medication, seeing a doctor and will be formally complaining to the fort for a full refund and accountability that they need to put better safety procedures in place before same thing awful happens to a guest in the future if it HAS NOT ALREADY! I hope my injuries will not cause any other deeper issues, this has unfortunately ruined both experiences for us and we will not be returning and I will be sharing with everyone as I have been about the service, disorganisation, lack of safety and the sheer DANGER of visiting these forts. The pain I am now in has now ruined the remaining of the summer for me and I am struggling to do normal activities which is not what I expected when embarking on a unique dining experience.I was unable to enjoy the music festival the day after the dinner or my bank holiday weekend and I now need to be extra careful while I am on the mend making my work life and personal life challenging and upsetting.